"With my art I just want to survive."

A close-up of the charcoal drawing in progress of one of my favorite images by a certain Swedish surrealist who I absolutely love.

I've been working on this for a couple weeks now, only drawing in 1 hour increments because I'd get so excited after completing a section, I didn't want to ruin the glorious moment when I step back and gaze in awe. - Whoa, did I really just do that? 'cause that looks awesome! [charcoal down, reward self with Blow Pop] - It will be done by the end of next week, with only the hand to finish and light detailed work. I want to buy a mat for this and hang it up in my living room, but I may end up giving it away.

So hab ich endlich von dir erharrt: In allen Elementen Gottes Gegenwart.

Freed from the confines of tranquility, my mind wants to shoot off in all directions, emotions splattering all over the walls.

So many things begun, left unfinished. I lack the concentration, my motivation sapped away as quickly as it appears.

Solace will be had.

Fitness Update

Rummaging through my closets, I did some long overdue spring cleaning, filling a garbage bag full of clothes that didn't fit me... way too big, which means my exercise routine is starting to pay off.

I changed up the usual routine again, doing about 100 crunches along with a military inspired core workout. I'm also slowly bringing back straight up weightlifting to build muscle and weight.

Yesterday I finally increased my dumbbell weight from 5 lbs to 10 (yes, I know - don't even say it) and can definitely feel the difference.

I would post an updated picture of my flat stomach and defined abs, however the mosquitoes have found me and think I'm just delicious... i.e. no one wants to see swollen red insect bites. So here is a shadow silhouette of me after my workout during a sunset:
Fun with Sepia! Here's two more I took during my weird "Sepia tone looks cool" phase...

This is what happens when you are the first to show up at a party... awkward.

"...Please don't take my sunshine away."

Two small black birds build a nest between the splitting wood of the weathered deck. The forsythia forest surrounding the mailboxes out front bursts with thousands of yellow flowers. Me in a thin black dress, sporting bright orange polish from my bare feet, pushes open the crooked kitchen window.

Spring is upon us; all is green, fresh, new, and I am ready. The window is open and I am ready to jump through it.

I received a job offer from the Census Bureau (finally!), which inspired an idea. An idea I've already been juggling around in my head, but the reality of diversifying my income gave me the motivation I needed.

With commissions in place for next year's pen and ink note cards, and the slough of pending projects I have yet to complete... why not take this creativity out of personal gratification and family gifting and make a contribution in the world, however slight it may seem?

Why not sell my art?

Why not?

Road Trip to Michigan

It's 5 AM, bags are packed, and on our way to Michigan for the Big Ten Wrestling Championships, three of my co-workers and I (only somewhat sleep deprived with a slight overdose of sugar), look at each other and say, "this was a good idea."

"World's Most Comfortable Swing" i.e. rotten bench, covered in dirty snow by the sketchy gas station.
Car with enormous slingshot attached...?
Through Ohio, and entering Michigan.
University of Michigan Stadium.
Wrestle-mania!
Downtown Ann Arbor
Foreign cuisine and sweet architecture
Small "art" sculptures

Did I mention my fascination with alleyways??
Graffiti

[Stop] Love

I was excited to see Philadelphia's LOVE sculpture represented on this window in downtown State College, until I noticed the Stop sign. Very odd. Especially when I am just beginning...

"Once everybody's dead, they do what they want."

I stumbled across this trailer for a documentary on the Barnes Collection and the controversy behind its possible relocation to Philadelphia. If it comes to theaters anytime soon I may have to go see it.

I haven't done anything sophisticated lately, so I'm planning a road trip. I've wanted to hit up all my favorite places I've long been neglecting:


used book stores - and add to my ridiculous Hamlet collection

vintage thrift stores - for those hidden treasures

art museums - to rekindle inspiration

Or maybe all I want to do is get into my car, turn up the radio volume, roll down the windows [if it wasn't 20 degrees and snowing of course], push the gas pedal to the floor, and speed away.

Instead of planning I'll let the road lead me - wherever I end up, I'll make sure it's worth it.